Wedding Traditions and their origins

Have you ever wondered about the origin of certain wedding traditions? 

Why does the groom bend down on one knee to propose?

In the days of knighthood and chivalry it was customary for a knight to dip his knee as a sign of servitude to his mistress and master. To all the men proposing: Just remember as you are getting down on one knee you already admit to who is going to be the boss!

Asking the father of the bride for 'her hand in marriage'

In a symbolic purchase, the groom would give the bride's father a coin and the bride would be passed from her father's 'hand' to her husband. Although the coin part is missing these days, it also conveys respect and approval between the bride's father and her new husband. 

Wedding Bouquet

Originally made out of strong smelling herbs, some say it was to fight of evil spirits, another explanation derives from medival times, suggesting that it was to cover up any bad smells! 

Another good explanation is that decorations were also limited in the early days and flowers have always been used to make any celebration more festive!

Bouquet Toss

Brides were and still are considered as especially lucky on their wedding day. Guests would sometimes tear at the bride's dress to get a piece of 'good luck' for themselves, or touch the bride to rub off some of the good luck onto themselves. To please her wedding guests, brides threw their bouquet to the 'not so fortunate ladies' as a 'good luck souvenir' giving herself and her dress a break from her guests. Very much along the lines of 'throw the dog a bone and he will be quiet and leave you in peace!'

Bridal Shower - Wedding gifts

In times when the bride's parents still had to provide their daughters with a dowry, some unfortunate parents were unable to afford an appropriate dowry. In order to save the wedding, friends showered the bride with enough gifts for the newlyweds to start a household. On the wedding day guests often brought dishes or drinks as gifts to contribute to the celebration or 'dowry gifts' for the couple's new household.

Bridal Veil - Giving away of the bride - Not seeing each other before the wedding

In the days of arranged marriages the 'promised couple' was not allowed to see each other before the wedding. Some families were afraid that if the groom didn't like the look of the bride's face, he would refuse to marry her, hence the saying 'It's bad luck to see the bride before the wedding' 

Sometimes the bride was also not too keen on her new husband, so the father of the bride made sure that he personally would lead her to the altar so she couldn't escape and only after he presented the groom with his new bride, was the fortunate or unfortunate groom as the case may be, able to lift the veil and see his bride's face.  

Luckily most couples know each other before they get married these days so the 'not seeing each other before the ceremony' doesn't really apply. The veil is a beautiful accessory and giving away the bride can be seen as the 'last steps together as father and daughter' in their old relationship, before the daughter forms her own family and also to congratulate and welcome the new son-in-law.

Garter Toss

One lovely explanation is said it derived from an old English tradition of 'flinging the stocking' 

In the days when garters were worn, guests would follow bride and groom to their bedroom, wait until they undressed, steal their stockings and then 'fling' them at the couple. The first person to hit the bride or groom on the head would supposedly be the next person to marry. Luckily for brides and grooms, this tradition has somewhat been adapted to offer the couple more privacy and less brutality!

Money Dance

An adaptation of the wedding dowry, wedding shower, wedding gifts. Some couples nowadays also chose to donate some of their monetary gifts to a chosen charity to help a cause they believe in.

Penny in a shoe

A European tradition, supposed to bring good luck to the bride but also fortune, protection against greed (so she learns to understand the value of money) and the ability to take care of the household finances. Some girls still collect pennies since childhood to accumulate these virtues to pay for their wedding shoes. It is supposed to ensure that the marriage will 'start off on a good foot'!

Something old....

Bride's often moved away from their families and took something 'old' to remind them of their 'old life' to have a sense of continuity in their new life.

Something new.... 

Something new represents a new life, a new beginning and a transition from childhood into adulthood 

Something borrowed....

Many people used to believe that if they borrowed something from a fortunate or happily married couple, the fortune or happiness would rub off on them.

Something Blue....

The color 'blue' symbolized purity, constancy and fidelity. As a sign of having these virtues, brides used to have blue borders on their wedding dress. As fashion changed, the blue border was substituted for other blue items.

Tossing Rice   

By believing that newlyweds brought good luck, guests used to shower them with nuts and grains as a symbolism to insure a bountiful harvest and many children to work the land. During times of poor harvest the nuts and grains were substituted by rice. (Probably less painful for the couple too!) Some couples also use birdseed or bubbles.

Tying the knot

Some say the saying originates from the Roman empire when bride's wore a girdle that was tied in knots and the groom had to untie the knots prior to the consummation of the marriage. Another explanation comes from the handfasting tradition where the couple's hands were tied together with ribbons as a sign of their unity. 

Wedding Cake 

Wedding cakes were originally made of wheat or barley and the cake was traditionally broken over the head of the couple as a sign of fertility and always having enough to eat. Guests would pick up pieces of cake and take them home for good luck. Another tradition was to place many small cakes on top of each other as high as possible with the couple having to exchange a kiss over the cake. Sometimes the cakes were piles so high that the couple had their faces covered in cake which may explain why some couples smash the cake into each other's face nowadays! 

Wedding Rings

One saying is that rings were tied around a bride's ankles and wrists to prevent her spirit from running away but as far as history dates back rings were always used as a token of sincerity, as a sign of a bond and as a precious gift for a treasured person. The phrase 'without beginning and without end' has been traced back to originate in Egypt. Rings were made from various materials, but over the years, purified metals like gold and other precious metals have established themselves as a visible sign between married couples.

Why is the wedding ring worn on the ring finger?

The Egyptians believed that the ring finger followed the vena amoris (vein of love) which runs from this finger directly to the heart. Wedding rings are a token of the unconditional love between two people that comes from their hearts.

Ring Pillow - Ring Bearer

This traditions derives from royalty who used to have their jewels presented to them on a pillow for their coronation. The person carrying the jewels was a loyal, dedicated person who could be trusted explicitly. Not to be confused with having to dress up like a bear like one upset little boy thought he had to do for the wedding! 

Why is the left side traditionally the bride's side?

In early days bride's were often stolen away whilst standing at the altar so the groom would keep his right hand free to fight off the robbers and not to injure his bride.

Bridesmaids and groomsmen

Under Roman law a couple was required to have 10 witnesses present at the ceremony for the purpuse of fooling off evil spirits playing pranks on the couple. They were dressed in matching clothing to confuse the spirits. Although it is still the bridesmaid's and groomsmen's

role to shelter the wedding couple from 'evil', being a bridesmaid or groomsman is also seen as an honor that they are closely linked to the couple. 

Wedding Kiss

In Roman times, a kiss was seen as a legal bond that sealed all contracts, hence the saying 'sealed with a kiss' 

Honeymoon

Because months are measured by the moon's cycle, one explanation is that couple were given one 'moon' and sweet foods like honey to get to know each other, another explanation is that during a certain cycle of the moon the couple would consume mead together (a honey sweetened alcoholic brew) to increase fertility. Whoever invented a honeymoon, it is a wonderful idea to spend some quality time with each other before diving back into day-to-day life! 

  

Author: Petra Maurus

www.minister-petra-maurus.com

Text may be used by others only with Author's credits!